Thursday, September 23, 2004

aryan up the khyber

just because im white doesn't mean i'm racist
but as it happens, i AM racist.

and it's the behaviour of one particular brown-skinned merchant navy guy who convinced me

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

pass the butter, love

when was my last Tango in Paris?

I dunno, but I remember my last Fanta in Bangalore

What a jerk

If you like to fantasise about death and unless you're a normal human being I'm assuming you do, then here is a sentence full of advice for you: please, please be careful you don't end up copying my Uncle Jack who had one wank about death too many...

RIP Uncle Jack, you were a terrible mother's brother and a compulsive masturbator but by all the powers of Morbor and Fuckeroo you were a damn fine Bosun

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

essay essay essay

the most contentious Olympic event is debatably the one where you spin round with a heavy plate-shaped thing in your hand which you release at just the right moment to project it way out into the distance.

Discuss

mark ellen, i'm thinking specifically of you, you cockhead

when did you last have a nice formulated turn of the 90's i recommend this album by someone you've not listened to, could be Dr John or Aimee Mann for example, it's great and you shouldn't vote conservative but do spend all of saturday perusing through the boutiques for just the right cafetiere look at the smooth lines on that nice piece of new technology you're going to buy experience?

relive it in full at the banglore fuckface, i mean, bosun of course.

grin thing

did i mention you have an arseface?

I didn't?

what are you smirking for?

wipe that smile!

and go fuck a duck

Hessian Blackshirt

I'm a private prison and i've only one inmate
He's an old Nazi and inspiration for New Romantics everywhere
He's bitter, sad and somewhat lonely,
imprisoned for life with no hope of redemption or parole

But enough of me and my subconscious...


Friday, September 10, 2004

down in a heil of glory

Take the Test

1. Do you believe War is man's natural state?
2. Do you dream of Dictatorship?
3. Do you love your country more than your very own cock?
4. What about your husband's cock?
5. When did you last get your full feast of Fascism?
6. Would you like some more?
7. Is something, anything responsible for all the ills in the world other than yourself and your mates?
8. What is your inside leg and head size? Do you look good in black or brown?
9. When you hear the word Stormtrooper, do you first think of:
a. A misremembered Deep Purple album title?
b. Some obscene white-helmeted gayboy with lasers from closet Jew and beard-wearer George Lucas' blasphemous piece of shit the Star Wars quinquilogy?
c. The glorious fighting machine from a bygone age of solid human values and mechanical obeisance.


if you answered of any these questions correctly, the Nazis had a name for people like you.

Nazis

sign up at the Bangalore Bosun , the honorary white, for the elimination of everything ever.

What does Hard Work Make?

Connaughty connaughty

Commit fungicide with wild abandon on the damp mushroomy territory of your wife with the new Bosun cream and pessary kit. Simply load the fungi-bomb down the flesh-dispenser and shake vigorously until you explode your load within. Then heat in an oven on gas mark 6 for 25 minutes, baste liberally and disinfect before sending in the fucking clowns. Available from all good branches of Bosun's and Dirtys' Connaught Creme for less than the price of a new woman most excerpts reckon

I really don't

I don't know.


Bosun Selector

read a fascinating piece on the Rationalism of Nationalism and the Nationalism of Rationalism at the Bangalore Institute of the Technology of Chappati Heuristics

a sensual reading

Buy turn-ups for your books at the online book turn-up store, online, for all your book turn-up needs.

'Turn-ups for Books Online'






Thursday, September 09, 2004

in loving mammary

Mantits?

They're my second favourite kind of tits


Tuesday, September 07, 2004

my only fiend

Suicide is not the only way out of any unbearable situation.

The Bangalore Bosun is handing out free murders. Sign up now.

all together now

Leave the willy on, Doctor
Leave the willy on, do
I'll be needing it in the morning
Just before I do my poo

Leave the willy on, Doctor
Leave the willy on, yes
I'll be needing it for doing things
And I don't want to make a mess

Leave the willy on, Doctor
Take the balls if you must
Mother says they're not for me
And it's you and her that I trust

You can find the lyrics to this song here don't you know

Do I beak your interest?

Build your own chicken in the comfort of your own home, then jail it, force it to do 2 periods a day, pluck it, fuck it, eat it then fuck it.

and only THEN can you come to the 'wattle it be?' party

squishy tits

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Only one man knows for sure

nobsessed

MEATCOCKS


Thursday, September 02, 2004

gutted

you like a laugh do you?

i'll BET you do

i'll bet your full of funny, pal

what's the bet when they open you up all they find is laughter and comedy.

it's VERY likely isn't it now

come here

i've got an idea

what? this knife? no, it's nothing.

come here

closer

let's have a LOOK!

that's it

mu-uch better

ssh!

don't be such a baby

it's just a stomach

i don't see any funny here.

only guts

looks like i lost my bet

go see the Bangalore Bosun

he's got the money for you.

pist?

are you pist? did you drink a glass of bir? maybe youve been to the pb and had an alcohol? personally i never booze it up, i drink only for to look top cool when there's good chance of top fuck with bitch

and all because the Bosun's lady loves Bangalore